Facebook…Friendship Denied

Hi, my name is Corey and I am seven days removed from Facebook.  It’s a scary thought, huh?  Could you completely walk away from Facebook?  To be honest, I didn’t think I could do it.  Yet here I am, a week removed from Facebook and honestly – I don’t miss it.

Do I have a personal vendetta against Mark Zuckerberg, social media, or the like button?  Of course not, as truth be told, much of my success and RemixYourHealth’s growth has spun off of the use of social media.  Then, why is it that after almost nine years, 700+ friends, thousands of status updates, and over a million likes I decided to end my relationship with Facebook and de-friend it for good?

This story involves love, pain, and everything in between.

The past 12 months have been one heck of an emotional rollercoaster for me.  The highs were so high (experiencing Europe for the first time with my brother, placing in the Bermuda Triangle Challenge, RemixYourHealth going international, being on TV, etc.) and the lows were low (walking around with the weight of potentially losing my job, losing RemixYourHealth and the financial stress and heartache in relation to the previous two).

Now, people of all walks of life use Facebook.  The frequency and detail put into their posts can vary from “the endangered poster” to the “over sharer.”  How I see it, there are five types of Facebook users:

 

1.)  The Philosopher:

  • Amanda Hugenkiss- “As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn’t supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You’ll have your heart broken and you’ll break others’ hearts. You’ll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you’ll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you’ve never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. You just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone’s hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts. Don’t be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back.”

This is your Facebook visionary.  Frequently takes close up Instagram pictures of inanimate objects and attaches a quote like this to the status.  Often posts song lyrics and open-ended statements.

 

2.)  The Drama Queen/King:

  • Kate Terrin- After all these years, I thought I knew you.  I never let myself see your lies, your deception, your arrogance.  After all these years, I’ve moved on, I’m tired of wasting time on jerks like you.

This is the mean green Facebook venting machine.  This person looks for validation by friends through their postings.  To add an element of mystery and suspense, they will never actually put names of whom the status is about in their post.  But really, everyone knows whom he or she is referring to.

3.)  The Grammar/Syntax Vultures:

This person hardly ever posts anything on Facebook. Status update? Hardly. New photos? Rarely.  However, god forbid you make one tiny grammatical mistake, use the wrong word, or have a typo in your status and they will be all over you like stink on doo-doo.

 

4.)  The Shameless Promoter:

  • Maddi Gascar- Hey everyone! Remember to check out the latest posting on RemixYourHealth.com.  You can check it out on RemixYourHealth.com where you will find the latest post.  Oh yeah! And totally remember to become a “Fan” of ours on Facebook and “Follow Us” on Twitter. Cheers!

The name says enough.  This person constantly blows up your newsfeed with their organizations events and statuses.  Another RemixYourHealth post? OMG no more… J

 

5.)  The Emotional Geyser

  • Sir Fin Waves – I just don’t know what I would do without all of my besties.  There’s so much bonding and beautiful conversations between us.  It’s like we are soul mates, angels that have descended from the sky to be among each other’s company.  I love you all so much.  Smoochies!

Boiling, sizzling, bubbling and ready to burst with emotion at any given moment.  Caution: the first few friends may get wet by tears of joy.

So here’s the thing.  Over the last year, I was every one of these things.  Is that a bad thing? Not really.  Human beings are meant to be emotional, driven by the things they are passionate about and by nature, a little gossipy.  However, this should be experienced in reality and not through the virtual realm of social media.

Social media, specifically Facebook, creates this paradox in which we can have instant communication and interaction with people that we would never say the same sh!t to in person.  It’s created a world that judges us based on the legitimacy of our online relationship status (if it’s complicated, you’re not in a relationship… hate to break it to you), the need for validation by being checked-in with you and your 456 closest friends, the likes we receive on our status updates, and the friends we acquire (78% of those friends you probably haven’t actually seen in person or spoken to in 2+ years).

For many, including me, and I swear Facebook built in an algorithm for this, it provides a constant reminder of what hasn’t worked in your life, what you aren’t experiencing, and what you weren’t a part of.  Satire and all, we have created a paradigm shift in which we compare “living” to what will be great to share on Facebook rather than living, exploring, and experiencing as we continue to write our own life book.

This is why I decided to leave Facebook. I lost track of reality, I lost track of having genuine conversations with the people I love talking too.  I forgot that everyone has baggage and that’s ok. Because life isn’t about the amount of baggage you carry but the journey that you endured to receive it.  I completely lost track of the value of remembering a friend’s birthday without a daily reminder, and only learned about babies, engagements, and break-ups through status updates and second-hand posts.

Facebook has brought great value to many things in our society and to me personally.  But it was time for me to get back in touch with reality and focus on the positive things in my life.  I wanted to experience life the way it was meant to be lived – raw, authentic, and served with a cold beer.

For one day, one week, one month, I challenge you to step away from Facebook, from social media and experience the life that was happening when you were too busy stalking your friends.  Instead, text/call your crush, apologize to your best friend who you aren’t currently speaking with, tell your parents how much they mean to you instead of liking their status and share stories and build memories with friends over a couple of drinks, a campfire, or a walk through life.  Are you up for the challenge? If so, I’ll see you out there.

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